to my valentine

To my valentine,

Thank you for this wonderful weekend.
For the magical day at Disneyland
For letting me hang out with your family.
For taking me to the beach and letting me spend hours in vintage stores instead.
For my favorite cupcakes.
For getting those Bye Bye Birdie DVDs.
For getting me ice at Maverick (and for being so thoughtful for thinking of it, even though I said I didn't want anything)
For letting me fall asleep.
For understanding my need for "alone" time.
For get tacos late at night because I didn't eat the greek food.
For helping me with apartment stuff.
For being supportive.
For letting me buy you silly element shirts.
For telling me how pretty you think I am.
For taking so many pictures and videos.

But mostly thank you for being brave enough to fall in love with me, for whispering those scary words to me during that fireworks show last year, and for being stubborn enough to hold on tightly to me even when the odds weren't in your favor.

I love you. x 1,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000
I always fall in love with you all over again when we go on adventures.
Happy {late according to blogger} Valentine's Day!

Day with Disney

A few photos from our day spent at the happiest place on earth.

What I love about Disneyland with Trac, and Disneyland for free, is the slow, unstressed pace we are allowed to take with our day. It's not as if we have to cram a lifetime's worth of dreams into a single day, like many of the princes and princesses you see parading around. We don't even have a daisy-obsessed, blonde-haired, blue-eyed toddler to drag around and impress (as my family did the last time we made the trip). We can hold hands and simply float through the park, talking for hours in line for rides, slowly slurping dole whip floats on an abandoned bench (for who else has time to sit down when your day cost you $300), and meander from store to ride to show in a thoughtless, relaxed, perfectly content fashion as zippity-do-da and wish upon a star soundtrack our day. If we miss anything, we will just catch it next time. No full day, sunrise to sunset, disney mania. Just magic.

This is how I really discovered that Disneyland can be the happiest place on earth. I fell in love with Trav for the first time in a quiet corner of the hunger bear restaurant only a year ago because there was no rush to make sure we got on space mountain one last time or made it over to our soarin'fastpass time before California Adventures closes at 10. We sat at that table and talked for a few hours (we had both been to Disneyland hundreds--most likely--of times throughout our childhoods in southern Cali) Much of our day this year was spent that way as well. I love it. You notice things when you aren't worried about fastpassing or how long the Indiana Jones ride is. Things like the little girls in their handmade Cinderella dresses, or the sparkle in the old man's eye as he sweeps up spilt popcorn while whistling along to the teacups (he retired ten years before as a coorporate lawyer and took this job to witness magic). You start to notice the incredibly organized and creative details of the park--the perfectly laid tiles, the hidden treasures in the cement walkways and stucco walls, and the "oh my goodness, even those flowers are growing in the shape of mickey!"

I know that for most people, Disneyland is a mad rush of happiness and glitter and fireworks mixed with overpriced ice cream bars melting down their kid's faces, face-offs for stroller parking, and extremely sore feet. And I realize most people do pay a small fortune for their day or two spent in this brightly painted fairytale wonderland. But I hope people don't lose sight of Walt's dream. "If you can dream it you can do it" He also said something about being able to build the most wonderful place in the world but it is nothing without people. As much as we love to hate things in life (especially expensive things), Walt's dream has helped a lot of other people's dreams come true. Including my cute cousin, Madison, who visited Disneyland for the first time this year. She got her hair done by her fairy godmother and was given a special order princess dress to wear around. She just turned 16 and she has Down's Syndrome.

I, for one, am a disney fan through and through. For the details, the glitter, and the magic. And I am extremely grateful for the people in my life that make it possible to enjoy this wonderland from this perspective, especially in this starving-student stage of my life. 

Eat sleep repeat

I think I'm beginning to get it.
The repetition that is life.
The eat sleep repeat pattern you fall into.
Because nothing is ever really new.
And if it is new its few and far between.

But for the most part you get to the end of a day
And realize you're just going to wake up to another day.
No matter how productive you were the day before
And no matter how many many goals you met
Or checks you made in your to-do list
You'll have to do it all over when you wake up.

This Monday proceeds another Monday
And both mark the start of another week
Another day closer to next weekend,
which will be two days like last weekend.
And each weekend we stop holding our breath
Like the weekend before
Until we realize on Sunday night that the weekend is over
And we have to get up on Monday and do it all again.

This goes for the few days a year that seem different as well.
Christmas time is always new and exciting
But always left with some line of "there's always next year."
And birthdays don't exempt you from anything really.
It's just another day on the same day every year.
And they is life!
Eat sleep repeat
Eat sleep repeat
Eat sleep repeat

I can only imagine how people stay sane.
I completely understand the "mid-life crisis"
Because who, after 30 or 40 years of the same thing:
Same schedule, same car, same home, same dreams,
And really a cycle of the same breakfasts lunches and dinners,
Could still be completely ok with their life?
Could ANYONE stay sane??

Sun up, sundown.
Maybe tomorrow.
Definitely next week.
I'll see you tomorrow.
Remind me at our appointment next month.
Welcome to 180 taco, The normal?
Next time I'll be brave and cut bangs.
Eat sleep repeat.
Eat sleep repeat.
Eat.
Sleep.
Repeat.

But what would I do without knowing I have at least this to depend on?